Abortion and undoing beliefs that no longer serve you

One of our doulas shares her abortion journey and how the influence of religion can sometimes leave an unwelcome imprint.

Undoing beliefs

The Guilt. I remember feeling guilty. Because I was so relieved. When it came down to the choice I made to have an abortion, I had never been so sure of anything in my entire life.  However, underneath my general certainty, I felt guilty. There was still the lingering belief that had been instilled in me through my upbringing in the church that what I was doing was incredibly wrong. 

It was a sin, and I was wrong.

Have you ever internalized a belief or idea, that over time you outgrew, but it still resided somewhere within you? Just like the cling and sting of burrs - the small prickly things that get caught on our clothing and in our shoes - every Bible verse, every “truth” I had memorized, left an imprint in my psyche. Many had stuck, and I was aware these imprints needed to be undone. I did not want every prickly thing to continue subtly hurting me. These beliefs were not mine to carry anymore. 

When was the last time you held a belief that no longer served you? 

Looked it in the eye, and let it go? 

Plucked it off of you, because it was a kind of sneaky hurting inside?

No longer yours because you knew something like the decision to have an abortion is a sacred act that is your choice, and your choice alone?

Dear reader, 

If you can relate to the damage religion can hold, if not shared and taught with unconditional acceptance of our humanity, please let this next part feel like a soft, certain, energetic hug. 

Your values and beliefs are not meant to harm you. 

They are meant to keep you safe, seen, and cared for. Having an abortion is one of the most incredible acts of value we hold in our bodies. Your decision to have one was not meant to contradict or devalue who you are. In actuality, your values and beliefs are what brought you to do it. 

You knew what to do. 

You knew.

Undo my friend.

With care and consideration, gently pluck every bullshit burr that is stuck within you.  Undo those beliefs that no longer serve you.

You know how to do this.

You do. 

-Maggie

Talk to a Doula

If you need to talk through your abortion decision with someone who is versed in spirituality, religious beliefs, and/or religious trauma, we have a doulas who can help. Your beliefs are yours and we are here to offer non-judgemental and choice-based counseling without an agenda. Contact us today to get matched with a Rouge Doula.